Mad Yank - the U.K. Connection

The TRUTH is Right Here

Hi, it's the mad yank's American Conextion again bringing you the latest in bullshit from the limey music scenario.

She's thin, I believe that she and her family live next door to the Adams family, she is not the most attractive of females, her voice is average (Jennifer Holliday's voice is better), she has been described as Canada's best singer (have they got a best anything?), her latest cd is top of the album charts here in Britland, it contains euphorically gut wrenching sentimental crap on most tracks, the cover is grotesque verging on the macabre, all the songs sound the same as the last load (great for insomnia) . . . what's the deal with Celine Dion?

Please don't tell me the awful racket is #1 in the US. I'm too scared to check! (McLaren would know.)

Since the over hyped Titanic (not my cuppa tea, what's with people drowning and being frozen? bring back Chevy Chase) the hype for her has been way over the top. You still hear the titanic crap on the radio all the time over here in limey land! All she sings about is misery and woe, christ, I know she had a bad time with her old man being ill, but that's not life as I know it.

Whenever I say something about her, all I get is 'ooooohhh, don't say that, her husband has cancer', so did poor joey, but that didn't stop people saying things about him. It seems that celine is treated like some kind of madonna (apologies to louise, I love her stuff).

Do you ever see the face or hear the voice of a singer that makes you wanna turn off, tune out and fuck off? That the effect that Dion has on me, I cringe at her very name. I hear she is a real bitch when recording, I hear she gets shitty and shouts like hitler addressing the troops! I recall going to a concert a few years back the guy who took Mrs Mad Yank and myself had the woman playing non stop at full blast. Damn, it drove me crazy! I guess this is where I got the loathing for her. I like to hear a happy sounding female singer, call me silly, but Sheryl Crow is more for me. Whitney also had this effect on me, always felt there was no sincerity in her voice, she kinda sang at ya, but hey, look where she is now. You get the drift. Another example is Mariah Carey, she can't seem to figure what note to sing, she sounds like an egg timer in action, up and down all the time like a roller coaster. As a DJ, people often ask me what I think will be listened to in 50 years time. I tell them, Elvis, Sinatra, Dinah Washington, Sarah Vaughn, Jerry Lee Lewis, The Temptations, Snoop Dogg....ok, just kidding on the last one. In England, the public put 'singers' like Dion and Whitney on pedestals, but in my mind, they are 5 minute wonders who will be long forgotten by then. legends will live on though. plus all the rock n roll artists (not Pat Boone) Alan Freed brought us, Bill Haley was rock n roll, so was Jerry Lee Lewis, Little Richard, Chuck Berry, Eddie Cochrane, Gene Vincent. It must be remembered that there is an acute difference between rock music and rock n roll. As I type this, I'm listening to Al Green sing Perry Como's for the good times. Check it out, that real sincerity! I must give a big shout to my bro xROGx , thanks for helpin with this shit!

bye till next time, god bless America!


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